Thursday, December 22, 2011


Recent text exchange with my best friend, Emilie

Emilie:OMG OMG OMG I found corral boots 1/2 off, my size....
I'm going back to get them when I get off unless you can talk me out of it.
Me: As your best friend and fellow shoe lover, I cannot in good conscience talk you out of this.
You will thank me later as you show off your new boots.
Emilie: :D

I absolutely love that we use each other to justify our needs, when deep down we know it may be a bad idea. And that, my friends, is how you be a best friend.
But seriously how could these be a bad idea?

And just for future reference if you ever need to justify anything that may seem ridiculous in any type of way, I encourage you to contact me.

Did a bird just poop on your hair?
Call me.
I will totally agree with you that throwing rocks at said bird is in no way animal cruelty.

Did your child just throw-up on your brand spanking new pants?
Call me.
I will totally suggest that you show them who's boss by throwing up on their pants.

Did someone just eat the last piece of chocolate pie right in front of you knowing how much you love it?
Call me.
I will arrive shortly with a pie made not for consumption but for throwing.

 Did a spider launch itself directly at your face because they are evil and do such things?
But seriously, other than that. I'm all yours.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Our First Real Tantrum

i hate to brag
{because i know it's going to bite me in the ass eventually}
but i seriously do have a really good baby
she's happy the majority of the time
she sleeps well
she eats really well
and she's as cute as a button
there's something about lillie...
but we've noticed she has well, what we'll call 
selective hearing
Lillie Mae, get down. Hot. That's hot.
LILLIE, no ma'am.
NO we do not eat crickets. put it down.
she usually fusses for a few seconds
and then she's hauling butt back to being adorable
and lately she's been testing us more than normal
she's figuring out she can do things on her own
{she only seems to be happy if she has a feeding utensil
in her hand with me as we're trying to eat dinner}
and like i said she has this selective hearing thing down pat
which is what we noticed yesterday morning
you see, we have this end table that we don't like her to climb on
it's where we keep our drinks, remotes, papers...
{okay, basically it's a junk station, don't judge me}
and while i think it's wonderful for people to create 'yes environments'
for their kids, i believe you have to teach your kid what no means
and it means n.o.
not everywhere you go will be catered to your child
and they have to learn that
we try to explain why, because we like explanations as adults 
and i used to hate it when i heard
because i said so
but back to the story at hand
the end table
she wanted it
and we were blocking it because we were being awesome parents
and playing with her on the ground
{instead of on our incredibly comfortable couch}
so, we told her no
picked her up, moved her, and tried to distract her
this happened about 3 more times
with each time her becoming more frustrated and well, frankly 
which then resulted in, what we'd like to call 
her first real tantrum
because she flung herself face-down into this giant bear
it's so fluffy!
and continued to cry
and we did something we probably should have held off on
we laughed
because it was high-larious
but oh, it just made her more mad
as the husband went to go pick her up
she did it
she really did it
she took a swing at him
she was probably just trying to push him away
{pushing, something the she loves to do when i'm feeding her
and she wants nothing to do with the cauliflower}
but in her anger with her tiny fists balled up
screams coming from her wailing lungs
and a look that could kill
i'm fairly certain we may have a  future UFC fighter on our hands
we both just stopped moving
and looked at each other
laughed again
i know, great parents, but hey, it builds character, right?
{another one of those parentalisms i hated}
and the second the husband picked her up
she stopped crying immediately
and starting smiling
and pointing to the table saying
what's that?
in her adorable little baby whisper voice
and we melted
our daughter, boy has she got us trained or what.