Lillie's Birth Day

i had plans. 

you know, the kind where i will get everything done that needs to be done in this set amount of time because i'm a rockstar

but yeah, that did not happen

because i made my first mistake as a mom - 

i forgot to take into account that

kids.don't.like.plans.

you see, my little butterbean, was late. 

nearly two weeks late.

despite me trying nearly everything in the book to convince her it's not so bad out here

she refused to let go of my uterus

i had finally conceded that i was going to be induced

and that was that

november 17th was the big day

so, when november 16th came i just went about my business

i had plans to clean and go to the store and spend some time with my mother and brother who had come in for her birth

i woke up

had alfred help me from the bed

{you try to get up by yourself at 10 months pregnant}

wobbled to the toilet

plopped down on the seat

did what needed to be done

stood up

and...

peed myself

or rather, that's what i thought i did

you see, i didn't want to be one of those girls who thought their water had broke but really just peed themselves

and i was way confused because i had just.went.to.the.bathroom

so, i told the husband

"hey, i either peed or my water broke"

which he then responded with a "well, what is it"

which then escalated into me vehemently telling him i had no idea, i'd never been pregnant before, i don't know what contractions are and i'm convinced this hell-baby wants nothing to do with me

so i did what any emotionally charged woman would do in this situation - 

i tried to shoo him off to work which didn't work 

he thought it was hilarious that i was convinced if it was labor that i would somehow drive myself to the hospital

{i know, it sounds ridiculous to me now, especially after feeling contractions, but i swear i knew i could do it}

it was 7:30am. i called the doctor at 8 and they asked me how close my contractions were, etc.

{i was still convinced i was peeing because i didn't feel anything}

we set off to the doctor about 8:15

i felt contractions on the way to my OB

alfred could tell because i would conveniently stop talking

and about 9am my OB confirmed what my husband had already been telling me

i was in labor

i was just grateful that i didn't waste a trip to the doctor because i thought i had peed myself

we checked into the hospital

i immediately asked for my epidural

{i had been told by multiple people to do this first thing because it may take them some time to get to me}

they checked my dilation, i was at a 3

contractions were ok

i was settled in watching television, breathing, thankful i decided to eat a small bowl of cereal before we left

{i had heard/read that eating something light was okay}

and 2 hours later i was at a 5

the contractions weren't bad exactly, but i knew i didn't want to go any further

without my epi, alfred asked about it

the anesthesiologist made it in and 

hooked.a.sistah.up

i was in heaven

and then around 4 they told me i was almost a 9

and i started feeling some pressure

and more pressure
and more pressure

i finally asked the nurse about my epi and they quickly gave me a refill and a few moments later it was almost 5 pm and i was ready to git.r.dun

my OB (whose office was right next door) came running from his office

{literally i saw him running from his office to the hospital from my window}

and i was already doing 'practice pushes' 

my gawd, you hear that pushing actually feels good but you never believe it until it actually does feel amazing

you don't want to stop

and i didn't

i got in trouble because i wasn't giving my body a break between contractions

but i was not  going to be pushing for up to 3 hours

{the doc had told me it can take anywhere from 30 minutes to 3 hours prior to this}

and it didn't

at 5:25pm our Lillie Mae was delivered

in perfect condition

{albeit with a slight temperature}

and i was so proud of my husband who never left my side

and kept me smiling through it all

{we actually fist bumped after a particularly nasty contraction to let each other know we're kicking this labor's ass}

and it feels as if it was just yesterday

that the nurse rolled her in our room and everyone had left
that alfred and i looked at each other and asked,
what do we do now?

and how we left the hospital and on the way home were simply amazed that the hospital just let us leave with a baby. 

we had no qualifications. 

no babysitting time between us. 

neither of us had successfully even changed a diaper!

and yet, here we are a 1 year later

parents to the greatest blessing we have ever known

she has taught us so much

and we look forward to her teaching us

{and hopefully us teaching her}

throughout many more years

Happy 1st Birthday my beautiful darling girl

your smile brightens our day, our hearts and our soul

we love you.

mom&dad