Friday, March 22, 2013

I just do.

So. In less than 24 hours I’ll be running the Bearathon.

IMG_0542

That’s the sign I saw for about a month every time I went into the gym. It was a nice reminder that I’ll soon be dead so I may as well give it my all. Why dead? Because look at it closely – go ahead, get your glasses on or just get all up and personal with your computer – it’s fine. No one is looking.

“Toughest Half in Texas”

Yep, it says that. And yep, I believe it. I mean, look at these hills? This is a serious situation I’ve gotten myself into. Why didn’t anyone try and talk me out of it? What friends you are. Sheesh.

Bearathon Hills

But on the serious, this race specifically has been the one I’ve been working towards this entire past year. It was always sitting in the corner of my mind, staring at me, reminding me, of something I said in passing.

You see, last year, I ran the 5k portion of it and as I finished it 9 minutes faster than my 5k time in January – it hit me. I like running. Total weirdness. After the race, I spent the day with My Emilie where we decided to stop by the Farmer’s Market which happens to be located near the end of the Half-Marathon course. So, we had to wait for people to run/walk/puke by before we could park.

I remember saying, “I don’t care how much I like to run, there’s no way I’d ever run for 13 miles.”

And we both laughed hysterically at the idea of running that far while agreeing that was pretty much for the crazies in the world. 

And much like my food post the other day where I mentioned how I explicitly remembered calling someone fat – I remember saying that like it was just 10 minutes ago. I remember me feeling that was true. I would never call myself a half-marathoner. I wasn’t capable of that.

And here I sit. Typing to you. Getting ready to run my third.

Getting ready to run the one that started it all.

I am more nervous than I have ever been before a race. It feels so surreal to think that I’ve been running for a year. A YEAR. And that I want to run for many more. When did I become such a motivated person? I’ve always just coasted through life, doing what I had to do to get by, so this. THIS. This just shows me that I should never close the door on something because I don’t think I’m capable.

When people ask me how I do it, how I run for 3 continuous hours, you know what I say?

 I just do.

And it’s true. I just keep swimming, err running. (Nemo FTW!)

More often than not while running I’m fighting a constant battle within my head,

“Do I keep going? Do I stop? Why would I stop? I’ve already gone this far. Because this is stupid. It’s your legs. Just stop if they hurt. Sheesh. But they don’t hurt that bad, do they? I could go another 3 minutes. Yeah, that’s it just another 3 minutes.”

And tomorrow, I’ll be fighting again as I lace up my shoes, wipe the sweat from my brow, hit play on my iPod, and just do.

9 comments:

My Moms a Whack Job said...

Your a runner, you have this! And holy cow! I have my third in five weeks and it has ONE huge incline and I am freaking, that one is crazy, but hell, you will just do it. You will! You won't die.

Sara said...

You're going to do great, girl! Make the Bearathon your bitch and kick it's ass!

Can't wait to hear all about it! :-)

Breenah said...

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow and tweeting at you! What time is the race?

Kate said...

The half/full marathon they have in Knoxville every year is full of constant hills. I've read post after post about how if you're wanting to PR, do NOT run in Knox. Yeehaw.

But I don't think they're quite as intense as the ones you're going to be running!

Also, this post pushes me to complete all of the hills at my park that I've been dreading recently. You're a badass for making me feel like a badass.

Amanda Arr said...

I think the motto of my triathlon club comes in handy. "Suck it up and keep moving!"

You'll do great, just kick that whiny, self-doubting voice to the curb and have fun.

meg m said...

your rock dude. can't wait to see how it goes!

Holly said...

I can't believe I'm just finding your blog now, but I'm glad I am! I love your outlook on running--it's very similar to mine (and I'm a new runner as of last year--training for my first half in May). I bet you crushed that half this weekend :) Can't wait to hear how it went!!

Susannah said...

Eeeek!!! Good luck with the run!

Amy said...

=)
I'm constantly having to tell myself "suck it up, just finish!"
:) I'm glad i'm not the only one who has inner conversations!
I wish i loved running, i dont. Maybe if i tried more?
I can't wait to hear all about the race, sounds like you've worked mighty hard to get to where you are!