Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Who Do You Spend Time With?

Lehmann Laughter

Welcome to 30 Topics; 30 Weeks! This link-up is scheduled for every Wednesday over the next 30 weeks. If you miss Wednesday, just link up on Thursday. We’re not picky.

As a quick run down, it’s based on these two articles – here and here. You are free to take the topics in any direction you like – I am only providing a guideline to get the ball rolling. Hell, I may not even follow what I wrote. But as long as it relatable, I’d love for you to link up! No pressure, I promise. :)

You can find more information on the weekly topics by clicking here and if you’d like to download them in PDF form, you can do that by going here. Let’s get started!

Lehmann Laughter

I am an optimist. I assume the best in people. I’m a fan of second chances and even the occasional third chance. I like going through life with my heart open to new friendships. I’ve met amazing people because of it.

I’ve also met some really shitty people because of it - who have confused my kindness for weakness and taken advantage of me.

When I was younger, I was convinced everyone was my friend. And if they weren’t? WELL, WHY THE HELL NOT? I wasted a lot of time worrying about other people instead of focusing on making myself a better person. Simply put, I was a people pleaser who only saw faults in myself, even if the fault was clearly in the other person.

As I’ve grown older, and admittedly more assertive, I’ve realized that not everyone is my friend. I have people in my life I like, I enjoy but that I do not seek out and I think that’s alright. So, my circle of ‘friends’ may have diminished significantly since I was 16 hanging out at the local car wash but I think the quality of friends I currently have certainly makes up for it. I’m learning to make time for the right people in my life and sidestepping the wrong people.

I spend a lot of time with my husband. He is my best friend. And has been for nearly 13 years. He was there with me hanging out at the local car wash, he was there with me when I finally saw my mom after 4 years, he was there with me as I finished school (high school and college!), got my first real jobs, and gave birth to our beautiful daughter. That is only 1% of our life together. There is so much more. He is one of the right people in my life. And I know this because we both choose to be involved with each other. IMG_9607

Farming is important to him (not so much to me) but I make time to share those experiences with him and learn about it. It gives us something to talk about beyond the weather, our daughter, and local small-town gossip. He, on the other hand, listens to me ramble on and on about running, or books that that I love. He has no interest in running or reading, but he’ll listen. Like I said, we choose to be involved with each other and that’s part of why I think we’ve been so successful in our marriage. We both want to be here. Even on the days when we don’t. Like, when he doesn’t pick up his soda tabs. Or when I forget to unload the washer and our clothes smell moldy. [I’m not the only one this happens too, am I?!]

I thought about listing Lillie first because I spend a ridiculous amount of time not only with her, but worrying about her. But the fact is, without Alfred, there would be no Lillie. Without the foundation we’ve built over the past decade there’s no way we would have survived that first year post-partum.


I spend time with My Emilie, who I consider family. We’ve been close friends for 8 years (more, I think?) and know more about each other than we should probably admit. And since my sister has moved back to Texas, we’ve gotten a lot closer. There are other people who are very important to me (my in-laws, my family, a few other friends) but seeing as I don’t want this to go on for days, I’ll start winding it down.

I’m lucky to share my life with these wonderful people. But I’m blessed that they choose to share their life with me.

Now, it’s your turn. Link-up below and check out others that join in and comment when you can!


The Lady Okie said...

I really liked this. I feel like I learned more about you! Great idea. I'll be linking up when I can for sure :)

Kate said...

I'm sad that I didn't see about this link up until it was too late, but I still might jump on board and post it tomorrow instead. :P

I loved this post! Alfred seems like such a great guy. I don't even know him, but I like him. I think that's also a testament to the way you express your feelings for him through social media. I obviously don't know him at all, but I can tell he's a great guy by the way you obviously appreciate him. :)

Abbey said...

Love your relationship with Alfred.

I feel like people who are willing to go to a race for you are always Good People. Because standing on the sidelines for hours waiting to see your sweaty significant other/friend/family member can't be the most exciting way to spend a Saturday morning. And they're often freaking early. But when someone will go to a race for you (or, alternately, take baby duty while you run for months ahead of the race and then on race day)... That's a Good Human.

And also, Farming! We love Farming! Yeah!


Genna said...

I LOVE how you described your relationship with him! It's so great to know someone chooses you to be a friend. That's how I feel about Cam too and it's just so satisfying knowing he didn't HAVE to be with me or be my friend but WANTS to be.

Ink Stained Page said...

I really like this posting idea :) May have to join in!

I love the way you describe your relationship with Alfred. Just love it!

Laura Darling said...

I love this! And Lillie is a doll!